Fat Flush Soup

It's no secret that the last few weeks...probably a month and a half, actually...I have not been on the wagon so to speak with my eating right and exercising.

I have been very stressed. I have forgotten to eat. I have eaten too much. I have not exercised much because I have been so tired, and I just want to go to bed.

Last weekend, while in the check out line with the hubs at Walmart, I stumbled across Women's Health Magazine, at least I think that is what it was. On the cover was a picture of some soup with the title, "Fat Flush Soup!" So, I opened up to the article. It's a diet created by Dr Anne Louise (http://www.annlouise.com/)that is a soup recipe you make and eat for lunch and dinner for a week. She has several books, which I did not buy but they talk about fat flushing for life, etc.

I love soup, especially of the tomato variety and this one is tomato based, so I thought, what the hey? I'll try it. Maybe it'll get me over my hump. Then I ran into a small roadblock. The recipe calls for beans. ICK. I hate beans. I mean like, even looking at them makes me want to gag. But I tried to keep an open mind, and I started a thread on an online community to ask about what type of beans I should use. The beans are for fiber, and I thought I should go ahead and keep them in. I was told that white beans or kidney beans would probably be best and that I should try to puree them and use them as a thickener for the soup, that way I won't have to actually chew a bean.

Last night, I made the soup. I got the beans and put them in the blender and pressed puree. Oh my nasty, they looked so gross all squished up. Then I got a whiff. Gag!!! I couldn't do it. I just couldn't do it. I poured them down the drain and turned on the disposal. I would rather take a fiber supplement than put that into my soup.

Breakfast for the next week is a choice of scrambled egg white with veggies, a specific smoothie or plain non-fat greek yogurt with fresh fruit. I chose the yogurt because I never get up on time to make scrambled eggs or make a smoothie. I measured out my yogurt and added my fruit and took a bite of it.

GROSS!!! Greek yogurt is the most sour and disgusting thing I've ever tasted, besides beans of course. Those are really gross. Anyway, I made myself eat a few bites with strawberries and ended up throwing the rest out. Sick. Lunch and dinner will be the soup.

Luckily, I can have two snacks and those can consist of veggies or a piece of fruit. I am glad I brought extra carrots to tide me over today.

Here's to fat flushing! We shall see what happens. Wish me luck!

Stress=Weight Loss?

I don't know if it does for everyone since all people are different. I know some people don't eat at all when they're stressed and get all skinny and anorexic looking, but some eat way more and get all bloated and stuff.

For me, it just depends. I already have anxiety. When I'm anxious I tend to not eat because of how I feel. If you have never suffered with a real anxiety disorder, there is not a great way for me to explain how it feels to be anxious. I can try, but this picture says it best...

That and the fact that you constantly have a sick feeling in your stomach like you're nervous all the time and your heart feels like it will beat out of your chest at any moment. Your brain races at a hundred miles per hour and every time your kid asks you a question, you start freaking out. You can't drive without thinking everyone is trying to hit you and you constantly second guess everything you're doing or saying. Who wants to eat when they feel that way?

Anyway, I'm going through a bit of a stressful time right now, and I keep forgetting to eat. Despite my daily medication, my anxiety is through the roof and I have been having to take the emergency pills quite a bit. Yesterday, I barely ate a thing. I forgot to eat breakfast and then ate some lunch(a cup of noodles-WHEEE!) since it was too late for breakfast and then I forgot to eat dinner. By the time I was at home from baseball practice and the kids were in bed(yes, I fed them much earlier in the evening), I decided it was too late to eat anyway. So, I ate a thing of yogurt, which made me want to gag because I hate yogurt. The texture of it makes me feel quite pukey. Blech. So, I drank some water and crawled into bed, hoping for some sweet release. But alas, I could not sleep. Stupid anxiety.

My whole weight loss journey has kind of gotten off track lately. I haven't been working out, unless you count chasing my toddler and playing baseball in the backyard with my son. I haven't been logging my meals into my fitness pal account...but then again, I keep forgetting to eat and because of my anxiety levels at this time, I forget what I'm doing every 5 minutes anyway. Anyway, despite all these stress factors, I still find my pants getting saggier. It is strange, but I won't complain. All I want is to feel normal and healthy and be able to eat without feeling like I will throw up at any second. Thanks anxiety. Thanks so much.

One really good thing though, is that even though I've fallen off the no coke(cola, not powder)wagon, and have started to drink it again, I am drinking it way less. As in, I can't even finish a whole can when I open it. My husband keeps getting annoyed because he finds half drunk cans in the kitchen. "What a waste!" he says. In my mind though, this is a good thing. Good because I'm not getting the cravings as often, and good because when the craving does hit, it just takes a couple of sips to remember that I don't really care about it that much anymore.

Strange Things are Happening

Well, I haven't been doing a good job at counting my calories and I have been extremely lax in working out. I did step on the scale and it hasn't budged, up or down, so I suppose that is good.

However, my pants are falling off. How is this possible?? I don't understand it but I am not going to complain. Not even a little.

Cheeseburger Meatloaf

Because I haven't talked about cheeseburgers in a while, here is a delicious picture of cheeseburger meatloaf. This is not my recipe. I found it in one of my cookbooks and have made it a couple of times. I haven't made it in at least a year and a half, but since I haven't really had a cheeseburger in months, I might make it soon.
http://www.tasteofhome.com/Recipes/Cheeseburger-Meat-Loaf

Ok, ok. You got me. I had a cheeseburger on Labor Day. It was freaking good too.

Yes, yes, I did eat a leftover cheeseburger the day after Labor Day. Don't judge me.

I'm ahead of you!!!

Let me be frank. I really suck at eating right. I also pretty much suck at exercising. I did pretty well for a good while. The last couple of weeks, however, have not been good. At all. I haven't logged on to myfitnesspal.com in a while. I have eaten some fast food lately(gasp!). I have been drinking some soda too. OH THE SHAME!!

Anyhow, yesterday, at my kiddo's baseball practice, I discovered one of the other moms is also doing C25K. So me and my friend(another mom who is awesome enough to humor me by "running" with me) went to the track and joined her for the run of the day. She said she was on week 2.

I'm on week 3. Not that it really means much since I haven't stepped on the track in over a week. I decided to be a smart ass and said, "We're on week 3!" and she was like, "Oh really?" And I'm like, "Oh yea, but we can do week 2 with you. No big deal!"

Ha ha. That shit hurt. Really bad. I wanted to die. I whined before my 60 seconds of running was up and boy was I waiting for that bell to ding! DING!!! WALK!!! Music to my ears.

Anyway, I'm sore today. My legs are on fire. I know I shouldn't have gotten that bacon, egg and cheese mcgriddle this morning, but I won't lie. It was good.

I'll get back in the groove tomorrow. Maybe.